Friends

First of all, I would like to apologize to everyone that is around me. Sorry to be such a suckish friend by your side, maybe not even a friend like just a random human talking to you.

My clique is my friends. My classmates are my acquaintance. My friends now became schoolmates. Where did the word close go? I have no idea. 

I feel the distance but I do nothing but just stare at it. Feeling like shit not doing anything because I’m just afraid. Afraid of what? I’m not sure about that. The fact that I always see people being happy with their friends just make me jealous. I mean yea maybe I look like I’m happy and smiling. But as I said before my body doesn’t really react how I want to be. 

So what’s the point of laughing and smiling? Nothing? Entertaining purpose? 

The point is if there is someone you are being close with just maintain the relationship. Hopefully, I will have the word close friend in my life soon. 

I am just blaming myself for being a shitty friend okay, don't worry is not your fault. :)